A Year Of Random Questions & Thoughts

Written in October of 2007....I stopped blogging for awhile because I felt that my mind, heart & spirit weren't in a good place and everything I wrote was a reflection of things I would rather not share.
It has been one year ( actually, it was a year ago yesterday ), since I lost a dear friend, Edie to Breast Cancer.
 It made me question so many things about life and why we are here. Why, if there is a God, would he take someone like her away from her friends and family? Why not take someone who wasn't so vibrant and good?  Why take someone away from this ugly world that made life more fun, who made life more beautiful for so many? Someone that made people feel better about life, just because they knew her? Why did she have to suffer, even though she never let on to anyone that this damned disease was winning the battle? Why did her family have to lose this wonderful mom, wife, daughter, sister? Why not take someone that didn't do good in the world, someone that didn't help others?
   All through my own battle with this disease, she was there to encourage me through my treatments. Those moments when I was feeling down or when chemo was kicking my ass, when the neulasta shots they gave me  after chemo made me feel like my bones had turned to hot lava.  She was dying and yet, she kept encouraging me to stay strong and to fight... encouraging me to live!
   It has been a year...and in this one year, how many times, I have wanted to pick up the phone and just say "hi" or "Thank You" and I can't, because she was taken from us!  But the world is full of ugly people that hurt others, people that steal, lie, & kill, people that hurt children & elderly....others that don't do anything at all...Is it because she was too good to be here?  That makes no sense to me!!! She helped the world by always helping someone else and by always being kind.
It has been a year and there is still a void, an empty spot that can't be filled...she was a very tiny person, but she left a huge empty spot for so many people.